What is the threshold?

I finally cracked last night. I was overwhelmed by grief.

It took me almost 12 days to finally realise that I have loss someone who has been an important feature of my life.

I cracked and realised that my threshold has been expanded to quite an extent.

I find it interesting to experience a re-learning of my experiences and having a deeper understanding of myself, especially in unravelling "Who am I?"

"What makes a man?" and "Who am I?" seem to be my pre-occupation these days. And I wonder "Why?"

What Makes a Man?

My 'father' once said that a man is one who has achieved the capacity to not only fend for himself, but also his parents, especially his mother. He should not start his own family until he can comfortably support his parents.

I saw through my 'father's' last rites today. He became my 'father' because he was responsible for financing my upbringing. Through his sponsorship, I managed to complete my education up to junior college. He stopped providing for me when I completed my A Levels as he felt that it was time for me to fend for myself.

I went through NS mostly on my own allowances, courtesy of the armed forces. Although I gained entry into a few universities in the UK, I could not afford fees, etc. Hence, I took a military scholarship, bu t it was my mother's tears which prevented me from leaving this island in 1993 to pursue a double degree in economics and geography at the University of Sheffield. In the end, I spent my undergraduate years at the local university.

In memory of my 'father' I shall again dedicate a space for him. May his generosity be remembered through my continued service to the community and more so about how the unknown gesture of a Man led to the development of a driven activist who hopes to make the world a better place.















Al Fateha....